I Don’t Do Shakespeare

We have a chap at The Atrium Open Mic Night (1st mon of month), who reads a bit of Shakespeare. All good. Some of the feedback we had was ‘That’s a bit boring.’ or ‘I don’t do Shakespeare!’ Let’s face it, non of us who went to school pre 1980 ever did!
 
I have contrived a poem to show that – we ALL do Shakespeare. The poem is ‘littered’ with words and phrases that The Bard ‘invented’. His words are in italics. I have chucked in some typos and a phrase that is NOT The Bards’.

I DON’T DO SHAKESPEARE!

Knock, knock, who’s there? You can’t say his phrases are
Neither here nor there.
The Truth will out not Melted (vanished) into thin air!
I’ve not slept one wink, and dare not blink!
When we see what he gave us, it should make us think!
With bated breath, For goodness sake,
I don’t do Shakespeare! Give me a break!

This is not some Wild goose chase!
No Fashionable? Just Fancy free?
I don’t do Shakespeare, dear me!

Bedazzled by a Heart of gold?
It’s All me Arse, I’ve been told!
Well just hold fast when You breathe your last, Dead as a door-nail,
To use his words from day to day, Lord you just can’t fail!
I don’t do Shakespeare!

When you’re In a pickle or In stitches,
Remember who gave us this Lexicon of riches!
What the Dickens and Mum’s the word,
And hundreds more we’ve all heard!
There’s a method in my madness, Fast and loose, In one fell swoop!
The words and phrases arl Shakey scooped!
So when you want to Send someone packing, remember how Obscene is our gratitude lacking!
I don’t do Skakespeare.

Too much of a-good-thing, may reduce The faint hearted to Puking!
The game is up! Come what may, you may have had your Salad days!
But you can’t escape each word, each phrase!
I don’t do Shakespeare.

What’s done is done! And in your heart of hearts it’s a Forgone conclusion,
It’s taken this Rant to show you you’re using; his words and phrases each day!
Now I have come Full circle.
From his words do not, yourself cloister.
All’s well that ends well. And in the words of the Bard – The world is your oyster!

– Phil Seery, 2016

As Phil mentioned, on the first Monday evening of each month, there is an open mic night at The Atrium, Victoria Street, Liverpool, L1 6DE.

ndps

You can keep up with ‘The Nearly Dead Poet’s Society’ (who put on the monthly event) on their Facebook Page, or on Twitter.